America's Next Top Model Auditions

A good friend of mine asked me to accompany her today to America's Next Top Model auditions here in chicago.

shes a huge fan of the show, and can pretty much tell you everything you want to know about all 12 cycles. shes also always wanted to be a model... and since this cycle is focused on petite women (5'7" and under)... it seemed like her perfect chance...

i tend to be pretty shy and private, so i've never had any desire to be a model at any point in my life. but... recently i've been working on being more adventurous and expanding beyond my own worldview... and i wanted to support her... so i decided to tag along...

so this morning she picked me up at 5:30am and we headed off to auditions... when we got there... what seemed like thousands of girls were already there (turns out it was only 699 lol).

we stood outside in line for about an hour before we headed inside to get checked in.

the plan was that my girl would get her audition time slot and then we would go get breakfast, she would drop me off at home and she would come back later with our other friend who was auditioning as well...

but when we got inside, we found out that we were not going to be allowed to leave the building, apparently due to the large number of girls lining up around the building, the police demanded that the producers contain the girls (this of course was due to safety issues).

so... there i am... being handed a number and a wrist band... and being ushered into a huge ball room where hundreds of girls where already waiting...

It was a surreal experience... some of these girls travel from one reality show audition to another.... a sisterhood of the traveling reality shows so to speak.... this is what they do with their time and lives... preparing themselves and planning their lives around when their "next big audition" is...

for others this was a dream unfulfilled... this was their chance... short girls of all shapes and sizes who had been told all their lives that they... for whatever reason... were to deficient to be viewed as beautiful by the world...

there was something tragically heartbreaking about it... how desperately these women needed to be labeled as beautiful by these arbitrary male producers.... it was ironic as well... tyra banks... a self-proclaimed advocate of young women's self esteem and self love... was the one responsible for these thousands of young women across the country rangling themselves like cattle to be poked, proded and looked over....

so there i was... trapped between a young woman who wanted this so bad she was physically shaking.... my girlfriend who wanted me there for support... and surrounded by young women who hadn't eaten (to look smaller that day? or because they rushed out the door?) who were daydreaming about ribs, waffles, and the sustenance of being the one in a million who is picked from the crowd of girls...

i was indifferent about the experience until it came time for us to actually "audition." which quickly turned into one of the most demeaning experiences i've ever had the misfortune of being a part of.

there i was... a black feminist, activist scholar, a second year doctoral student, daughter of a haitian freedom fighter and civil rights era black feminist... lined up against a wall with 50 other girls as a man asked us to say our name and age "with as much personality as we could muster," while he walked up and down the line evaluating our bodies.

it was scarily reminiscent of the auction block. i couldn't help but be consumed with thoughts of how black womens bodies are continuously offered up for purchase. there we were... offering up our sacred bodies as material objects, to be evaluated, bartered and sold...

ultimately... 40 of the young woman walked away from the experience dejected and cast aside... their dream of being labeled as beautiful, and therefore worthy, once again trampled by a structure dictated by white normative cultual values that continues to find new and unique ways to strip them of their dignity...

peace.

Let's All Point & Laugh at Rihanna

I have to be honest...

Over the last couple of days I have been deeply disturbed...

On Sunday night we all learned that Chris Brown and Rihanna would be absent from the Grammy's due to an alleged episode of domestic violence.

As the days followed, those rumors have been confirmed, with details that described Rihanna's injuries as horrific.

So what followed? An outcry from the community against the devastation that domestic violence causes in all of our lives? A denunciation of Brown's heinous acts and calls to boycott his music? Or even... a small expression of concern for the health and safety of this young woman?

Not at all...

Instead what followed was shameful...

Yesterday I was struck by the many facebook status' of friends and acquaintances, most poking fun at the situation, some asking what Rihanna had "done wrong," and many men (jokingly?) ascribing to the belief that this type of behavior is not only normal... but acceptable...

Some went so far as to make a photoshop picture of what Rihanna "might look like" after the beating...

The radio had caller after caller all saying the same thing... "well... i love chris brown, so... i'm going to go buy his album anyway... its not that big of a deal"...

And I found myself paralyzed with nothing else on my mind but... WHAT THE HELL?!

When probed, most of the authors say that they are just "joking" and of course domestic violence is terrible or... "damn why you gotta take everything so seriously?"...

But I take it seriously... because... shockingly... a woman being beaten within near inches of her life is serious... a country that is so desensitized to violence against women of color that all we can think to do is laugh, is a life-threatening matter.

Black women are actually 3x's as likely to experience domestic violence than any other sub-group of women, they are also substantially less likely to report it.

And why should they report it? In a country where the criminal justice system is ill-equipped to do anything at all about domestic violence, and where police officers are hesitant to get involved in "domestic disputes," it can seem almost fruitless.

But even more significantly, even if the police and the court system do take a woman's complaint seriously... often times, a womans own community will not. Like reports that alledge the reason for the fight between Chris and Rihanna was because she gave him an STD... to frequently we blame the woman for the altercation and ask, "what did she do?"

We ignore rampant physical and sexual abuse of black women and girls in our homes and the homes of our neighbors and family members all for the same reason... at the end of the day... we believed she deserved it... or even worse... we believe that its "none of our business..."

But that's just it... it IS... our business... it is our business to create a climate where women young and old know that domestic violence is NOT their fault... where women and girls believe that they will not be ostracized, blamed or made fun of for speaking out against their abusers... where women can know that if they seek help they will RECEIVE it...

Each and every one of us has to take responsibility for the reality that today, most women of color do not feel comfortable, let alone safe, taking action against their abusers. It is the fault of every last one of us... it is our words and our actions that have created that reality... it is our refusal to fault the men who engage in this pervasive violence that has allowed this problem to take root in our community...

So today I urge you all to take responsibility for the impact you have in your neighborhood, school, business or "social network".... pick your words carefully and thoughtfully and pause next time before you make that "domestic violence joke."

peace.

(Picture Courtesy of Vivre Magazine.Com)

The Problem with G's to Gent's

So here's the thing about G's to Gents...

Last season when I watched it I couldn't put my finger on what it was about the show that bothered me.

I watched the entire season, and at times was relatively entertained... but throughout... there was something about it that irked me...

And while watching Real World (which I love by the way... lol)... I finally put my finger on it...

The whole premise of the show is that Bentley (the show's host) is supposed to be changing the young men from "gangsta's" to "gentleman"... which on its face seems to be a very positive thing...

He encourages the men to be more involved in the lives of their children, to be less violent and to even be more financially responsible...

The problem is this, the entire show is situated within this "gentleman's club" constructed by Bently... which is supposed to mimick an elite country club... ironically... the same type of country club's that excluded blacks as a general policy not even 40 years ago...

The show places the construction of the "gentleman" as the ideal that all of these men [mostly men of color] are supposed to be striving for. the problem with their conceptualization of what constitutes a gentleman, and according to the show, what constititues "manhood," is how euro-centered it is.

In order to become "men"/"gentleman," the shows participants have to cut their hair, shed their clothing, and any other non-european cultural signifiers.

This is problematic because it infers that listening to hip-hop music, and participating in black/latino cultural traditions is one and the same as being violent, irresponsible and "deviant."

While lots of people would agree that whether we like it or not, black professionals often have to make cultural sacrifices in order to be a part of corporate or academic America. I think there is a difference between being willing to make the sacrifice so that we can change these environments for the future of our children... and actively perpetuating the attitude that european cultural norms are what is "professional," "acceptable," and/or even "normal."

If we accept "europeanness" as the goal... instead of cultural diversity and understanding... then ultimately, we are actively participating in rendering our own cultures and values illegitimate...

peace.

Final Exams: A Uplifting Way to Procrastinate

Hey folks,

these are three blogs I just found that are completely worth taking the time to "productively procrastinate" and sneak a glance at...

Sassy Women is a really cool blog for women of color in their early twenties-thirties... check it out... its fun, serious and inspiring

The Change Blog... this blog is great if you are having a hard time getting/staying motivated and/or inspired. It is full of great tips... including... how to motivate yourself to wake up early everyday, being more productive and staying organized, living a healthier lifestyle, decreasing stress, and living more consciously... take a look, I promise you will love it.

Motivation Mama.... having a hard time getting started in the morning? Check out this blog!

good luck all, and don't stress to much...

peace.

What I learned about being a good scholar in 2008

I originally wrote this just to post in my own house... but I figured that since it was useful to me, maybe it would be useful to you as well...

• Brilliance isn’t something that just happens, it is cultivated.
- Presentations and workshops stimulate your intellect, creative thought doesn’t just happen in an isolated vacuum. Make time and go!
- You must read and you must write notes about what you read. Read for papers, read for exams, read for classes and when you don’t have any of that to do, read what you know others in your field have read and are reading. You are more than capable of engaging those around you when you come to the table with the proper tools.

• There is a lot of value in being theoretically AND empirically strong. Don’t allow one to become stronger than the other. The scholars you admire most are able to study whatever they want, because they have the skills to do so.

• Your presence matters. Show up, speak up and engage your department.

• Living fearfully is not living.

• Your sanity, happiness and health are just as necessary for brilliant scholarship as your academic work. Never neglect yourself.

• Continue to build relationships. The people you meet now will be your colleagues for the rest of your life.

• A plan for the day/week/month/year/career are critical to achieving your goals. Everyday should be structured, everyday should be composed of a series of tasks so at the end of the day, you can feel that you’ve made some progress.

• Failure is an imposter. Things not going to plan just means there is an opportunity about to happen that you failed to anticipate.

• When you go to campus you are going to work, always dress the part!

• You are blessed to be where you are.

• Everyone doubts themselves sometimes, even those you admire the most.

• Sometimes you have to be able to respect the work, even if you don’t respect the person.

• Stay creative! Creative thought is what matters at the end of the day! ☺

peace.

Why Are We Being So Ridiculous About the Obamas?

I haven't had much time to blog lately, mostly due to the large workload that never fails to sneak up on you at the end of the quarter...

So... I'm going to do another quick post...

Can I just make one thing clear?

Michelle and Barack Obama are not anybodies Messiah... they are not indicative of the Second Coming... they are not God's gift to the world... and they do not represent the defeat of racism against African Americans, sexism and misogyny against black woman and every other kind of oppression present in the world...

... they just don't...

I'm frustrated because I feel like black people are being totally unrealistic on this one...

Every girl friend I have has had a facebook status talking about how shes looking for "her Barack" at least once... and a significant number of my male friends have had status msg's about how they are lusting after Michelle...

Whats worse... are the articles like the one recently printed in Newsweek that goes so far as to argue that it is Michelle Obama's responsibility to represent all black women everywhere and to fight every negative stereotype thats ever existed about them.

I hate to disapoint everyone... but it's really not...

Now don't get me confused, like most of my friends I am a bigger fan of Michelle, than I am of Barack. And I continue to get excited about the presence of all those black women in the White House... living and not serving... I love the thought of soul food cooking in the White House kitchens and hot combs and pink hair oil in the bathroom...

But at the end of the day, our communities compulsive need to find a new "messiah" to represent us, in the way we fantasize Malcolm and Martin once did, is ultimately what cripples our journey toward social justice in this country. We point to the Obama family as the answer to harmful stereotypes about our families, our women and our men.

We argue, like the Newsweek article did, that if there are just enough "good examples," then suddenly racial and gender injustice will just suddenly stop being present in our lives.

When the reality is... at the end of the day... it just really isn't that simple...

And I would think the larger presence of articles about Michelle Obama's ass... than articles about what she brings to the White House as First Lady... would be indicative of that...

a la higher learning....

WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

peace...

"I Will Be Your President To..."

I don't know how most people felt about last night's speech, but I was truly moved. I was probably more moved or at least just as moved, as I was during his speech after winning Iowa in January 2008.

I'm going to keep this short, but I want to point out one part of this speech that I found particularly poignant.

President Obama told those Americans who did not support him that, "he would be their president to." On the most basic level he was letting those Americans know that he would listen to their concerns and that he will do his to best to address them in a way that makes them feel like they have a place in his... our... new America.

But it seemed to me, that on a deeper level, he was also saying something more aggressive and commanding. By saying "I will be your president to," he was telling those nay sayers who used everything from his race, to his age, to his "community organizing" in a attempt to discredit him, that he was now their president. That picturing him as a monkey, or putting his picture on food stamps, or claiming the White House for "whites only" would no longer be acceptable. Because he is their "president to." And as such, as Americans, as citizens, they MUST, leave their racism at the door and get behind him.

President Obama made it very clear in his instruction to us to "summon a new spirit of patriotism." The racial demons that McCain and Palin tried to resurrect from the American burial grounds of slavery and Jim Crow are not welcome here, and those who attempt to haunt our future with them, will be defeated.

peace.